Trying New Sex

Bondage is Fun too

First Time with Bondage

Recently my partner asked me if I liked to be tied up. I had never tried it before and the inner-psychologist inside of my saw a major red flag. Quite frankly, I was a little worried. I've always had negative associations with bondage. I started to read up and understand it before trying it and I learned a lot.

Not everybody that likes bondage was abused.

This was my first fear. I felt like the only way someone would get into this was if they had a history of abuse. As it turns out, this is not the case at all. Plenty of well-adjusted people are into it because of the adventure. When you think about sex or a great story, there is always a build up of tension before a great release. This is a way of adding to the tension in hopes of increasing the satisfaction of the release. Once I started looking at things this way, I became much more open. Could I possibly even like it?

Does this means whips, chains, sex swings?

I had this vision of the gimp from Pulp Fiction when my girlfriend first mentioned bondage. Like anything else, there are extremes and while taking things to a medieval level can still be considered bondage, it isn't the norm for most people. Handcuffs or a little rope can create a lot of great sexual tension.

Will I have to wear leather?

No. There are really no defined terms. It can be as simple as a woman tying up her partner to the bed and teasing him (or her) with a feather.

What would the neighbors think?

It's likely they are doing it too. If they aren't, they still might try it. Once a relationship gets stale, it's one of the things one of the partners usually recommends to spice things up in the bedroom. I overheard my girlfriend's book club (might as well call it a wine club) and all the women there were talking about their bondage experiences with their husbands. It's much more prevalent than I had thought.

After my hemming and hawing, we decided to give it a shot. I used handcuffs on her and she loved being strapped to the bed. Then she asked me to spank her. It got me much more excited than I had expected. In fact, we've started talking about taking things to the next level with a mini whip. My advice to those afraid is to not knock it until you try it. I like it way more than I thought I would.